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The
online comic by Scott McAllister Updated
Tuesdays & Fridays |
FLAT 7A |
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Name: Grant Aykroyd Weiss Status: Student (Disgruntled) Skills: Brain can hold unlimited useless trivia, but nothing of real value. Comic book junkie and haircut dodger. Grasp on reality is dubious at best,
not helped by hostile college environment. Not uncommon for fantasy life to
intrude on reality. His rich internal fantasy life helps him fend off
the occasional bout of stark raving reality. |
Name: Brody Howard Status: Student (Disgruntled) Skills: Master of all fighting games, as humiliated opponents in local
arcade will attest to. Staunch SEGA and SNK supporter, when sober that is.
Requires a carefully managed balance of booze and gaming to handle the
education system. Has been known at exam time to challenge exam board to face
him in a showdown in the arcades instead of resits. |
Name: Sam Rebus
Status: When he finds out he'll tell you Skills: Can pass any subject, as long as he can complain while he does it. Bitter survivor of the education system recently turfed out into the real
world with only a qualification for comfort. Unwilling to settle for
any old job to tide him over ‘till he can pursue a proper career, Rebus
languishes in unemployment. Operates on a hair-trigger when he isn’t drunk.
Jealous of Ferris, but usually sides with him against Grant and Brody’s
slacker ethos. |
Name: Ferris Hughes Donnelly
Status: Employed Skills: Damn good with computer software. Pays the bills with his mad programming skills. Collects DVD's like
squirrels collect nuts. Owns a powerful computer, which the others abuse
given half a chance. Being the most successful person in the flat does have
it’s down sides ‘though… Slightly resented by Rebus because of the
whole 'employment' thing and mocked by Grant and Brody for having a work
ethic. |
FLAT 7B |
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Name: Rosalyn Young Status: Student Skills: Can smell a single male from distances of up to 150 yards. Upon inspection of her dictionary, one would not be surprised to learn
that the word “subtle” is missing. Plans to be a prosecutor, despite
warnings that declaring “he bloody well did it” do not constitute proof
beyond reasonable doubt. |
Name: Jane Morgenstern Status: Student Skills: Can pass any subject, as long as she can fret
loudly while she does it. Known around campus as “Xena: Worrier Princess”.
Jane is one of those people who worry constantly, despite the fact that she
is obviously very capable. Like a more nervous version of Rebus when he
was a student, except that she has better people skills. |
Name: Dana Kirby Status: Student Skills: Can find anything funny. If Dana succeeds in completing college, it’ll probably be down to the help
of Karen, who has more than enough level-headedness for the both of
them. It’s not that Dana is a total ditz, it’s more that she has no
clue where to begin, and has a knack for getting distracted that can put
Grant to shame. |
Name: Karen Miranda Harker Status: Student Skills: Immune to work related
stress. Occasionally denounced as evil by
the others because she actually enjoys her subject. Rarely worries about
anything. With her easy-going nature, she often steers Dana and Jane
away from mental breakdowns and mishaps. |
COLLEGE STAFF |
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Name: Peter the Bastard
Status: College Lecturer/Aspect of Evil The ENEMY, or at least one part of it. One of the many faceless, hooded
faculty members who make education a living nightmare. Remember G.I.Joe?,
imagine having Cobra Commander for a lecturer. |
Name: Aloysius the Chameleonic Bastard AKA The Dinobeast Status: College Weapon Of Terror Skills: Can change skin colour and can breathe green fire. It’s a giant mutant dinosaur. It’s evil. And
it’s eating your essays for fun. |
Name: Colonel Strang Status: Commander of the College’s troopers. Skills: Trained to be
professionally unpleasant. |
Name: Shock Troopers Status: Hired Thuggery Skills: Marching, goose-stepping, parading, spit-shining and
hippy-beating. |
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Wake Up Screaming and all related characters © 2004 Scott McAllister -
In other words: MINE!, MINE!, ALL MINE!